Winter Olympic Edition: SkiFree
Easily one of the greatest advances in computing achieved in the 20th Century, Ski Free (part of the totally awesome Windows Entertainment Pack that shipped with many family computers in the early 1990s) catapulted users into a pristine world of glistening snow, drunken purple ski bunnys, and ferociously hungry monsters. Probably the only Skiing game anyone has ever played, Ski Free is probably better than any of those newfangled snowboarding video games with their fancy polygons.
Missing your 16-bit skiing? Chris Pirih, the Microsoft Programmer who authored Ski Free, has recompiled the program to run under 32-bit and 64-bit operating systems. I'm running Windows 7 64-bit, and the slopes are in great shape. Get it here.
Green Police: Probably Coming For Me In My Sleep
Confession time: I did not watch the Super Bowl this last weekend. I know, I know - it was a deeply un-American thing to do. However, for a guy who wasn't born in the US-of-A, I figure I do enough 'Murican stuff (driving big cars, watching television, voting, complaining about voting, being entrepreneurial, and eating hamburgers) that I should be given a pass at least once a year.
However, just because I didn't watch the game doesn't mean that I missed out on the most American part of the spectacle: the commercials. And this year, thanks to the growing ubiquity of the internet, we were beaten to death with treated to previews of many Super Bowl ads online before they aired during the big game. Probably the most interesting of the bunch, for me, was Audi's odd "Green Police" campaign. These ads were previewed ad nauseum on the internet before the Super Bowl, causing a Jalopnik, among other blogs, to notice certain creative choices about the campaign that were totally fucking creepy a little off.
Didn't watch the game either? See the madness for yourself below.
And while the stumbling idiots who comment on YouTube videos good YouTube viewers have rated this video a miserable 3/5 stars at the time of this posting, I'm still pretty disheartened in the future of the human race to see that the Green Police channel has 417 followers.
Meanwhile, I can only hope to lure the Green Police helicopter into a high-speed pursuit.
What Do You Reckon They’d Part With One For $500?
Just Waiting To Pounce.
The gents at Speedhunters were invited into a warehouse which apparently contains heaven. More specifically, a seemingly endless line of built Evo Xs that were set aside for a spec series that never happened. Now they just sit. And wait. And look really angry. Also in the warehouse: all the kit required to run a group-N rally team. Absolutely amazing.
This Hasn’t Got A Damn Thing To Do With Us
HOWEVER, I simply couldn't let it pass. Via 11Points.
So THAT's what Ron Jeremy Looked Like in High School
Standard On Your Next Set Of Tires: Judgment
I understand the little leaning motorcycle, but what the hell is going on with that elephant?
The guys over at Asphalt & Rubber have made note of the latest development in motorcycle tires. Now will you not only have shameful chicken strips on the sides of your tires to indicate how much of a badass you are (or are not, in my case), if you bought a set of Metzler Sportec M5's, they'll include some awesome pictograms to help your buddies rank your skills as a rider.
Meanwhile, keep trying to convince your friends that you're not a wimp, you're just riding fresh rubber. It might work.
Not at Your Local Pick’N'Pull: Porsche 917 Throttle Bodies
!!!
This hatter-mad seller on eBay is offering up a pair of throttle bodies for the legendary Porsche 917. If you've never heard of this particular beast before, then allow me to pull your head out from under that rock. In various forms (including the super-bad-ass Long Tail 917 pictured above, in equally bad-ass Gulf Oil Livery), the 917 dominated the 24 Hours of LeMans in 1970 and 1971, as well as delivering insane punishment unto the 1973 CanAm Series, where its pancake 12 cylinder engine was twin-turbocharged up to a modest 1,580 bhp. Not too bad.
If you share the seller's insanity, you can take this pair of throttle bodies for the Buy It Now price of $3,995. Of course, with no indication as to whether or not these babies ever lapped the Circuit de la Sarthe, you'll have to be a real Porschephile in order to justify dropping that kind of coin. Unless you're cobbling together bits for your garage-rebuilt 917. In which case, shine on you crazy diamond.
Via Hooniverse, naturally.
Big In America
"I'm gonna rise up, I'm gonna to kick a little ass, I'm gonna to kick some ass in the U.S.A., gonna climb a mountain, gonna sew a flag, gonna fly on an eagle. I'm gonna kick some butt, I'm gonna drive a big truck, I'm gonna rule this world, I'm gonna kick some ass, I'm gonna rise up, I'm gonna kick a little ass. ROCK, FLAG, and EAGLE!!"
-It's Always Sunny In Philiadelphia
The Nurburgring: 1967, as narrated by Sir Jackie Stewart
This video does a pretty good job describing why I'm racing in the 24 Hours of Lemons. I may be too late to take flying laps to the Nurburgring with Sir Jackie in bell bottoms, but I'm damn sure going to seize on my opportunity to take a team racing. Even if it is in a clunkbucket.
